Recently, Jesse and I were discussing an important decision that we needed to make. Jesse felt pretty strongly about what we should do, but he wanted to make sure that it was a decision that we made together. I did agree with what he wanted to do, but there was something that was holding me back and making me feel nervous about it. But I couldn't figure out what was making me feel that way. After some more discussion I began to realize what it was - I was afraid of people judging me. I explained that to Jesse and he said, "That's a valid concern. Some people probably would judge us." Well that wasn't very comforting!
I don't like being judged. I don't think anyone does, but sometimes I feel like I got an extra portion of "keep everyone happy and don't rock the boat" in my personality. There have been many times in my life when I have made decisions based on what others will think of me, rather than what I actually believe I should do. I'm not proud of that fact, but it's hard to change.
As I continued to struggle with my anxiety, the thought came to my mind: "Judgers gonna judge". A kind of odd phrase, but I found it encouraging. No matter what I do, there will be people who don't understand, who don't agree, who are going to judge me. Think of all of the people who have made a significant difference in the world. They were constantly being judged by people for what they were doing. Think about Jesus! People were misunderstanding him, disagreeing with him, and judging him all the time! If I am judged as I follow God's will for my life, I am in good company.
What is important is to live a life of integrity - where you do what you believe you should do, following in the way of Jesus and his will for your life. There will be people that judge, but there will people that judge no matter what you do. So live a life that you are proud of! I don't like feeling judged, but if people are going to judge me, I would rather it be for doing what I believe is right.
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