Trust

I had a great experience last week: I got to hear my baby’s heartbeat.  The midwife said that it sounded good and strong.  It was encouraging to get the positive report, and hearing the heartbeat added another depth of reality to the fact that we’ve got a little one on the way!  Reflecting on the experience since then, I thought that this would be a good opportunity to share about something that I have been reflecting on a lot lately.  Being an expectant mother for the first time has given me a new perspective on trust.

Here is why:  In normal, every-day life, I don’t get to hear the baby’s heartbeat.  All I have is a slowly expanding waistline to tell me that everything is ok in there.  Sometimes it is easy to wonder and worry.  Is he or she healthy and growing properly?  Some days I get to know, but most days there isn’t anyone checking in to make sure. 

I do a lot of reading on the internet about pregnancy, and I’ve enjoyed getting more information, but one thing that I found surprising is that there are some expecting mothers who buy for themselves the instrument that lets you hear the baby’s heartbeat, so that they can hear it any time they want.  I think that would be amazing – to be able to hear my baby’s heartbeat any time I want, and to know that it’s doing ok.  But then I had to ask myself – what about trust?

This child belongs to God, the Father of all, even more than he or she belongs to me.  While I can do what I can for my baby, ultimately God is the one who will protect them and watch over them as they grow.  And that will always be the case, not just now. 

I feel like there is a stereotype out there – the worrying mom.  And it’s not really surprising; there’s lots for mothers to worry about!  Wondering about what is happening inside me is just the beginning.

There’s a lot to worry about in this life without being a mother – my vivid imagination leaves me no doubt about that.  The struggle against fear/anxiety/worry has been a pretty consistent theme in my life, and I have a feeling I’m not the only one.  I want to be a person of prayer and faith, not worry.  Some days it feels like a losing battle, but looking back I am encouraged to see progress and growth.

There are always opportunities for growth.  Most recently, I’ve been learning to trust God with the safety of my wonderful – and adventure-loving – husband.  There are lots of reasons to worry when he’s out on his mountain treks and other outdoor adventures, but I have found that lifting him up in prayer and then carrying on with my day is much more life-giving than fretting and worrying.  And he has always been ok, despite the occasional mishap, whether from a car-size falling boulder or a malfunctioning GPS. 

And now there is a new arena in my life in which to learn trust – a child.  From wondering about the miracle going on inside me, to the day they leave for college and beyond, I am sure that I will have many new opportunities of learning trust.  It’s a little daunting, but I am also excited.  And I am very thankful for a patient God and a loving husband (who is much more optimistic than I am).  It is my prayer and desire that I will not become known as a worrying mother, but as a praying mother and a trusting mother.

Jesse's New Favourite Food

Last week I was going to a wedding shower, and I needed to bring some baking.  I thought, since I have a pretty relaxed schedule, I might as well have some fun and try making some fancy treats.

To start, I made Rocky Road Fudge Bars, a recipe of my Grandma’s.  That went well, but there were lots of extras, and Jesse couldn’t eat them because of the cream cheese in them.  As a result, I still have a bunch in the fridge, since I am not much of a sweets person.  I think I’m going to have to freeze them, until there’s another event I can bring them to!

  

I also decided to try out a recipe I found on the internet for Chocolate Donut Holes.  Sounded good to me!  Here is a link to the recipe:  Chocolate Doughnut Holes

The process of making this treat begins with making a cake-like dough.  I changed the recipe a bit, substituting whole grain flour instead of all-purpose, and using a mix of honey and cane sugar for sweetener.

After refrigerating the dough for a while, I had to rig a deep fryer for myself.  Our most heavy-duty pot served the purpose quite well.  I only put in an inch and a half or so of oil, since it seemed like I was using so much!  I didn’t have a thermometer to gauge the temperature of the oil, but Google is a mighty tool, and some research surfaced an idea: put a popcorn kernel in the oil and when it pops the oil is almost hot enough!

Instead of rolling out the dough and using a cutter, I took a hint from the comments under the recipe and dropped small balls of dough into the hot oil with two tablespoons.  I fried them for one minute, then flipped them over to fry on the other side for another minute.

The first few were a little burnt, so I turned down the element a little, and the rest came out perfectly! 

 

Once they were touchable, I rolled them in the glaze and left them to cool completely on a cooling rack. 

The end result was cakelike donut holes with a crisp, sugary coating.  They were nice and cocoa-y and not too sweet.  Jesse loved them, and promptly ate 10.  Good thing the recipe made a big batch!  He also persists in calling them “Timbits” – I take that as a compliment, since my donut holes are apparently worthy to be identified with the iconic Canadian treat.

Exciting Days

When does 1 + 1 = 3?  Not in math class, but apparently when you’re married it happens from time to time.  Jesse and I are anticipating the more visible arrival of our little one right around New Years.  We are very excited!  Were you thinking it was rather odd that I was talking about being so tired in my previous post?  Yeah, well that’s why I’m tired.  Apparently that tends to happen when you’re pregnant.  However, as I am heading into the second trimester, my energy seems to be slowly returning.  Hooray!

Why am I talking about my pregnancy on my blog but not on Facebook?  Well, I guess I am a bit of a rebel.  It seems like every week or two there’s another big “baby announcement post” on Facebook, and I don’t want to be like everyone else.  But then I thought, why not post about it on my blog?  That way those who take the time to read my blog can have the privilege of knowing.   

You’re welcome.  :)