So as Lent approached this year, I wondered If I should give up something. That thought lasted for about 1.5 seconds, and was followed by "Yeah, no". With the full time job of caring for a newborn, plus working 10 hours a week tutoring, the thought of having something else to think about every day just seemed like too much. However, as I thought some more, my attention was drawn to something that I have recently been trying to incorporate into my life. So in a way I am ADDING something to my life for Lent... and the more I thought about that, I also realized that there is something I am trying to give up. Not just for Lent, but for good.
The basic idea is that I am trying to find a sense of balance in my life, even though there is a baby who wants my attention every waking minute (and most of the sleeping minutes too!). After the first few weeks of being a new mom, I began to realize that I will have to be very intentional about taking care of myself and doing things that I enjoy and find refreshing. Thinking about this, I came up with 4 categories: my body, my mind, my heart, and being creative. Taking care of my body includes things like getting outside for a walk, that workout routine that I AM going to start... someday..., having a nap, and making sure that I eat well. (A surprisingly difficult task - see the last post for an example!) Engaging my mind is important to me, especially now that I have finished college. I want to continue learning and growing. "Feeding my heart" is the phrase I chose for the emotional/spiritual part of my life. I realize that those aren't necessarily connected for everyone, but they are for me. This includes spiritual disciplines like prayer, journaling, and Bible reading, well as things that uplift me, like playing music and spending time with a good friend. I included being creative as its own category because I find great joy and fulfillment in things like writing, trying new recipes, drawing, crocheting, etc. And I realize that these categories are rather artificial, with lots of overlap (for example, going for a walk does wonders for my emotional and spiritual health, as well as my physical health).
Now, before you make a comment on how that all sounds very overwhelming, it's important to know two things - these are things that I love, and that I spent a significant amount of time doing pre-baby; but more importantly, the idea is to do ONE thing from each category every day.
I still haven't managed it.
But that's not really the point. The point is to be intentional about caring for myself, as well as caring for the little human that God has given me. And this leads to what I am trying to give up - I want to give up being hard on myself, trying to be perfect. At the end of a long day of feedings, burpings, changings, spit up on the floor, and poop on my pants, if all I've managed to do for myself is get out for a walk, that's OK. There's always tomorrow. And the next day. But what I don't want to happen is for months to go by before I realize that I haven't been taking care of myself - or, even worse, to only realize it once I crash, physically or emotionally.
Will you join me, this Lent, in the challenge of caring for yourself? And the challenge of being ok with not being perfect?
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